Days go by
I have taken to my attention the fact that I am writing less and less. It is good to be back even if I don't understand at what shape I am returning to express my feelings. There was a lady who I had some sessions with her for over 2-3 years. On the weekend we had our final meeting. I got emotional over her good bye and good wishes despite knowing she just going to travel and enjoy her time. I am very thankful to her - Thank you Tal you are wonderful.
Life is weird, I suppose endings are a reminder for the way we go through. Loads of things changed in my life, more then I am giving myself a chance to acknowledge. Btw I failed my work test - there is a second test we will see how it is going to be.
I have an issue with my weight, self image and usual girly stuff.
I have noticed there is a guy - tall, blue eyed, bright haired and pretty handsome I can admit.
The thing I have noticed when he spoke and when I listen to his convo with our other coworkers is how much he loves and takes care of himself.
His way of thinking is "how can I make things better for myself" which is a different from my "nothing is going to change no matter what I do".
Opportunistic as hell I can tell, I don't blame him, I can tell we were raised differently for sure.
While he spoke of how he -MANAGED- , -Done- , -Succeeded-....
I talk of...'my boss dislikes me', 'I don't care of how others see me', I noticed I tried to have eye contact with him but I noticed he DOES NOT give a shit. I am glad though - I reflect on myself this way.
I am glad because I am learning about different types of people.
I also realize that people who might have the same likes as you do - are not surely having the same values or perspective as you have.